In 2009, I was traveling back to my parents’ house for my 35th Thanksgiving celebration with a very heavy heart, tear stained cheeks and bleary eyes. This was not just a visit home for another family holiday, but a much dreaded goodbye and blessing a letting go.
It all started three years prior. I was having dinner with a friend when my cell phone rang. The caller id said it was my mom for the 3rd time that day. I had ignored the calls all day as I didn’t have time to chat. I apologized to my friend and picked up with the intention of telling my mom I would call her tomorrow.
My dad was on the other end and my stomach sank. My dad only called when there was something deadly wrong. I had gotten far too many calls of the passing of aunts, uncles, cousins and grandparents to be all too familiar with the knot forming in my stomach. In true form for my dad, he promptly announced my mom had a form of malignant cancer, a poor prognosis and a short time left with us.
IT SHOOK MY WORLD.
My mom was my ultimate cheerleader. She knew when I was doubting myself before I even knew. She was always the one finding ways to build me up after the rest of the family tore apart my flaws. She was the one that always supported and encouraged me to follow my dreams.
My mom was raised that you went out of your way to not inconvenience others. I swear, it was because of this, that she made a deal with God to time her death so as NOT to inconvenience the family with multiple trips. She had told me several months prior that she would make it to the Thanksgiving holiday, but I needed to go shopping for a black dress for her funeral and pack it when I come back for Thanksgiving. I did what I was told.
When I arrived at my parent’s house, I was able to have a couple of conversations with my mom before our final goodbyes. Her parting wish for me was 2 fold, the first will have to wait for another post. The second, she asked that I reclaim the amazing woman I was growing into before I allowed others to strip me of my confidence and self-worth.
She asked me to find the beautiful, strong woman that she saw and heard every time she spoke with me. She also requested that I stop giving my life away to others and find a new line of work that supported me as an individual, utilized my unique talents and skills and allowed me time to have a full life outside of my work responsibilities. I was working in a demanding career as a fundraiser in the non-profit world for over a decade – a life-usurping career to say the least.
My mother's final wish was that she wished me ‘Enough’. (I’ll tell you more about Enough later. I’ve cried all the tears I can handle today!)
Just hours later, the entire family said their final goodbyes and my mom, my champion, my cheerleader, my strongest supporter, drifted away from her earthly pain and was welcomed into the arms of our heavenly father.
We celebrated her life just two days later, the day after Thanksgiving.
It took me a few months until I found my way to training for Health and Wellness Coaching through IIN. While in school, I not only focused on learning, absorbing and reading everything I could find on alternative health and wellness, I also focused on rediscovering who I was. Not me as the fundraiser, the daughter, the sister, the supporter, the friend; but who I was as a strong, confident woman.
My journey to renewed self-confidence, self-worth and an increased self-esteem began with a wish for ‘enough’.
I reclaimed the leading lady role in my own life and love using my special gifts and talents to help other women reclaim their own leading lady role with confidence, grace and radiance.
We just sent you an email. Please click the link in the email to confirm your subscription!
OKSubscriptions powered by Strikingly